I have fallen into a negative mom pattern; I'm looking at my phone too much, yelling too often, not taking care of myself enough. Bleh.
Last week I posted this on my Instagram:
It's more like that week was just the week that broke the camel's back. The weeks before it had been leading up to it, with me falling into bad habits and pretty much just reckless abandon ("I'll just drink caffeine all day and no water and that'll be fine!"). It is definitely not fine and I cannot hang when I'm not taking care of myself.
I think we all get into ruts and it's so nice to just take the time to step back and look at what you're doing that you don't want to continue, and decide on what you want to start doing instead. Sooo...here's where I'm at.
What I want:
Spend less time on my phone
Spend more time with my kids
Spend more time doing things that recharge me
Things I'm doing that I don't like:
Checking ALL forms of social media pretty much all day long
Looking at my phone more than my kids
Yelling at my kids
Not sleeping well
Not drinking enough water/drinking too much caffeine
Being too cynical
Not being intentional
Things that recharge me:
Rest
Lots of water
Writing
Reading inspiring books and quotes
My mommy detox prescription:
Intentional action
Inspirational reading
Exercise
Because I'm pretty psychotic, I wanted to make an actionable plan that I could print out and get excited about. I saw these challenges on Pinterest and used most of their ideas for my own print out. Mostly the ones that pertained to me and my kids' ages. I also added in a few of my worksheets because they're perfect for this.
I have 3 different sections for each day; the first one is related to connecting with my kids, the second one is for detaching myself from bad habits basically, and just decluttering my mind/focus/life, and the third part is what I usually do every night anyway when I'm "being good". And when I put meditate, I don't mean how most people think of it, but more like a sequence of thoughts I go through. I'll explain further down with some links!
Feel free to steal my printout below for ideas or to even use as your own, whatever! There is also a blank one in the Printables Library as well.
Books I'm reading right now:
- Hands Free Mama - I've been meaning to read this forever. I love the premise of her book about letting go of distractions, putting down our phones and detaching ourselves from social media a bit so that we can actually live and enjoy life going on around us. For me I go through these phases where I just get bored or overwhelmed so I start looking at my phone more and then it becomes almost like an addiction where I constantly want to check my phone or have it my hand so I can check it at any free moment.
- LOA for the Real World - This is a law of attraction book written by Jeannette Maw and can I just confess how obsessed I've become with her recently? I didn't think much of this book when I first saw it a few years ago but since stumbling onto her blog and following her on FB, I've really come to admire her approach and attitude, she is awesome!!
- I also love to just re-read my favorite inspirational books, which I have highlighted so I just skip through all the highlights again. Specifically the ones by Mike Dooley and Pam Grout. So inspiring.
The third part of my plan every day is exercise, worksheets, and meditation. For the exercise part, I want to do the 30-Day Yoga Challenge below. I heart me some yoga, plus yoga is so good for all aspects of your health.
Before bed is when I usually fill out a worksheet or two from my book; I like the nightly re-centering one because it helps, um...recenter me....and just really helps me end the day in the right mind-frame.
And for meditation, there are two links I want to share with you guys. First, this app I've had for the last couple of years is AH-mazing. It's called Relax Melodies (not a referral link) and it's seriously the best app I've ever had for self-improvement. I first got it just for the sounds to help my boys fall asleep, but they've added so much to it now.
There's 6 isochronic tones, 6 binaural beats, and 36 guided meditations!!! For example "Stop Self-Criticism", "Manifest a Dream", "Increase Self-Belief", "Negativity Banisher" and "Balance Energy". Those are some of my favorites.
I sound like a sales rep but I'm not, I'm just in love with the app. It's great for listening to before going to bed, the guided meditations have helped me so much.
The mac daddy of meditations though would be the one below. It's literally the perfect phase of thoughts to go through on a daily basis: feeling compassion for others, feeling gratitude for what you have, forgiving anything or anyone that you need to, visualizing what you want, picturing the perfect day ahead of you, and then imagining the Universe/God blessing you and supporting you.
A guided meditation is here.
And I highly suggest watching this video on YouTube. He explains the process and why it's so powerful. 15 minutes a day and it truly makes a huge impact in your life - A 15 Minute Mind-Hack to Massively Enhance Your Brain Power and Emotional State
I actually like ruts because they springboard me into inspiration for living happier. Your rut is a gift! Learn from it what you desire most and then change things for the better.
This is such an awesome post! I love those printables! And this is the perfect thing to do before the end of the year! Ruts can be a gift because they help us realize what we need to change and give us the motivation to do so! Good luck with your detox!
I was thinking the same thing, perfect thing to do before the end of the year! Yeah ruts have a good purpose!
Girl you know I've been in a rut lately as well, but the fog is slowly clearing. I've noticed that when I'm away from my computer and social media that I am happier and so much more engaged with A. I love that you're being so intentional with all of this! And your printable is fantastic!
I'm glad you're coming out of your rut. I am the same way, when I'm away from my computer and social media it makes a world of difference.
Okay before I tell you why I love this post so much, I have to share an interesting fact with you... essaieblog (in your Instagram photo/comment) is a real-life friend/former colleague of mine! Laura is a beautiful soul and I'm so glad you "met" her.
Now that I've shared... this post is a big YES! I've yelled at my kids more than I would have ever dreamed in the past few weeks. About a week ago I told myself I HAD to stop before I found myself in a rut. My reset is unplugging - even if it's for 1 day. It makes a HUGE difference!
Moms can get into ruts and we need to reset ourselves. I try to do this, but I really should do it more often. I love the printables/links... especially the minimalism challenge. I'm going to have to try that one.
Yoga - you bet! I love yoga because it makes me BREATHE! (Something I actually forget to be mindful of).
Awesome post and tips my friend!
Yay for detox!
Wishing you a lovely day.
xoxo
That is seriously SO crazy that you know Laura, such a small world 🙂 Well, small blogging world, haha!
Also, I love love love when you share your parenting struggles because you are like, my parenting guru queen, so everytime you share these things with me, it helps me feel like I'm not destined to be a crappy parent because it happens to the best of us. Yes, unplugging does wonders for me. I always feel such a sense of calm.
Love your comments, Jennifer, they're the best!!
Pinned for future use! I know I'm not there yet, but I so anticipate this. I really admire your plan and your tenacity. AND your honesty!
Thank you so much Kelli!! 🙂 Yeah I always appreciate when other moms are honest about their struggles so I try to do the same, that way we never have to feel isolated or like failures.
Oh my goodness gracious, I need this in my life like whoa. I love all of these printables. I need to stick that main one on my fridge and circle what I do so Greg sees I'm not completely losing my mind! 🙂
Haha yes, you should've seen Luis' face when he saw this. He thought I'd seriously lost my mind.
Seriously, awesome post. I'm excited to try the meditation app. I joined Headspace for bit, but it gets costly once you move on from the beginner's trial. Happy Holidays.
I am OBSESSED with the meditation app. I use it every night. I've never paid $10 for an app, but this one is worth it. I feel like it should cost way more because it has all of those amazing meditations on it. I play binaural beats and a flute in the background while listening to the meditations. I swear so many days I experience something related to the meditation I did the night before. Love that app! Happy Holidays to you too!
Fantastic post Jessica! Thankyou!! I was in a massive rut last week. Isn't it a heartbreaking place to be. Bring on some self care and intention. Xxx
Thanks Ruth, I'm glad you enjoyed the post. Yes it's definitely a heartbreaking place to be, but definitely a good time to step back and reset. I always love what comes after pushing the reset button. <3
I think that as moms, we all go through this and we all have these moments and time periods! I know I do! I think that a mommy detox is exactly what the doctor ordered!
Yes, I agree! I seem to need a detox every few months, or maybe even once a month, haha!
SUCH a great post!!! You're not alone in this for sure and I'm glad to hear that I'm not either. What a great reminder… and actionable tips, to help us all get out of the ruts. Thanks so much for sharing 🙂
Wow ! This was haven sent . God bless you! I’m a mom of 4 and I’m still figuring it’s out for us and this just gave me so much motivation. Thank you for doing ur assignment by help us moms this is calling and I feel so blessed to come across this !